Wednesday, March 4, 2009

If Only

From Scrappleface:

"Omaha Mall Shooter Stopped by Armed Shoppers"
"As Mr. Hawkins moved into the ideal sniper position on the upper deck, an unnamed middle-aged man emerging from the nearby Von Maur department store noticed his odd behavior and glimpsed the muzzle of the rifle peeking out from the sweater. Almost instinctively the man moved toward Mr. Hawkins, reaching to his belt to draw out a Springfield EMP, a small, 9mm semi-automatic handgun.

As the would-be famous mass killer raised the rifle to his shoulder, the unnamed shopper commanded him to stop. Mr. Hawkins turned the muzzle of the AK-47 toward the commanding voice, a single shot rang out and Mr. Hawkins staggered, dropped his weapon and fell against the railing."
Scrappleface is a news satire site. Too bad.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

You left out the best part of the piece:

"Westroads Mall officials said they had not decided yet whether to press charges against the three who interrupted Mr. Hawkins’ plan by violating the mall’s gun-free zone policy."

I believe that the Jews have a great word for these folks - PUTZ!

Anonymous said...

Satire is right. If would have been a GLOCK not a Springfield EMP!

DouginSalcha said...

If only... If only...

jimbob86 said...

I carry an EMP, but it would not have been me..... I don't go into GFZs if I can avoid it. Westroads is not a necessity.

Anybody remember what NW shot?

Anonymous said...

I'm with Jimbo, I never enter a GFZ if it can be avoided. I don't even attend weddings or funerals, because they're all held in GFZs. Sometimes, it's unavoidable, but there's almost always an alternative, even if that means internet shopping.

jimbob86 said...

"a single shot rang out and Mr. Hawkins staggered,"

No..... that would be 2 to CoM, Observe for effect...... "staggered" is not "down"....